I have some news to share. I’ve stepped into a new role with a brand-new statewide organization, Healthy Relationships Florida (HRF). It’s a ministry built on one conviction: the fastest way to revitalize the church may be to revitalize the marriages already sitting in our seats.
Here’s the need, in plain numbers. Family breakdown is behind everything our communities are trying to fix — foster care, our courts, our jails, mental health, the achievement gap in our schools. Of more than 150,000 U.S. churchgoing couples surveyed, 22 percent reported struggling in their relationships, according to Communio, a national organization committed to strengthening marriages and relationships. That means they’re likely sitting in our services every week, and no one knows.
Locally, Northwest Florida has seen the fallout. According to the Florida Department of Health, Bay County’s rates of domestic violence and child abuse are more than twice the state average. Bay is ranked in the top 10 (No. 6) in the state for divorce.
Even so, we’ve already seen what’s possible. From 2015 to 2018, churches across Jacksonville set aside denominational differences and simply taught couples, at scale, how to love each other well. The result was a 24 percent drop in the divorce rate in three years — the most significant marriage turnaround ever documented anywhere in the country. The people who led that effort now lead Healthy Relationships Florida, and we’re working to bring that same model here, to our own six counties: Bay, Jackson, Washington, Holmes, Gulf, and Calhoun.
Here’s what makes this different: we come alongside the local church with proven curriculum, funding, training, and a local representative — me — and then we get out of the way.
And here’s the part I think should interest anyone who cares about the health of our community: marriage help may be one of the last invitations a hurting, unchurched couple will still say yes to. A couple walks in through a door marked, “Welcome to our Marriage Ministry,” and weeks later walks out through one marked, “Thank you for being part of our Discipleship Ministry.” Done across our whole region, this becomes one of the largest evangelism and discipleship efforts our state has ever attempted. Marriage is simply the front door.
If you have a heart for strengthening marriages & families, please talk to your pastor. I’d love to grab coffee with them and talk about what a partnership could look like. I’m not going to add another thing to their already overflowing plate. I just want to open their eyes to the couples in their church who might take the next step in helping other couples. There’s no cost and no obligation beyond the classes your church chooses to offer, and we can help with that, too!
Revival rarely arrives all at once — more often it starts with one ordinary person nudging their church toward something good. You could be that nudge.
Logan Kelly is program director of Healthy Relationships Gulf Coast’s Bay County Marriage and Family Initiative. Contact him at LoganK@HRFL.org or (850) 832-3291. To learn more, visit healthyrelationshipsflorida.org.
